Oct 25

Why marriages fail like white belts attempting flying omoplatas

The other day, in a rare moment, yours truly chanced upon an article on the interwebz that actually succeeded in grabbing my attention with just the headline.

Yup, it was good.

The topic was all about the silent marriage killer.

That was the hook, and I bit at it like a large mouth bass in fresh water. Just couldn’t resist.

Get this though.

The answer was actually something unexpected too.

It wasn’t sex, money, or communication.

Nope.

None of the usual culprits reared their ugly heads. Instead, the assassin of marriages was known by a different name. And that inner demon called logic, who thrashes and roared against emotion on the daily, even had to stop and nod its head in agreement.

There wasn’t even the slightest bit of argument either.

Shocking, I know.

But once logic heard that the killer was unmet expectations, it just couldn’t help but agree.

And that got me to thinking about something else right away (my mind is strange like that).

Usually killers strike more than once. And sometimes their victims don’t fit the same profile. That would be obvious if anyone ever had the skill and willingness to track down all the unmarked graves they’ve left in their wake.

Case in point:

Not that long ago, someone reached out to me with a question about frustration on the mat.

Lately, he’s been experiencing it in training. It stems from that whole unmet expectations killer too. There are times, when he feels that a technique should work, and it doesn’t.

That’s when frustration rushes up on him and clubs him upside the head.

We had a good discussion, and this is how I responded to one of his questions:

——————-

I would suggest that you start asking the right questions.

Example:

You just failed at a sweep you should have gotten, in your opinion.

In that moment, you can choose to focus on your failure, or ask why it happened. There’s almost always a logical reason. Maybe a grip is in the wrong place. Maybe he shifted his weight just right and you need a follow up attack.

——————-

Anyway, food for thought.

Use it as you wish.

Now on to another topic.

Some changes are on the way for the micro adjustments course. I might even change the name of it as well. The focus is going to shift far more heavily towards analyzing the specific micro battles in various scenarios. You’re going to learn exactly what goes into making technique work against resistance.

Yup, it’ll become an even better education in anti-assassin tactics.

And the training will happen here: